Monday, September 25, 2017

2017/09/25 - Nobody

Lately I've been realizing that I'm no longer somebody. I used to be somebody, but nowadays I've become nobody.
Seriously... Years ago I was somebody. Newspaper reporters actually interviewed me! I was the "14er guy", one of a select few who had made over 400 Colorado 14er ascents. I was a professional outdoor photographer. I taught mountaineering and led dozens of trips each year for the Colorado Mountain Club. 
In those days I was somebody that a lot of people knew. I was popular in certain communities. Now I'm just an old guy with an invisible past.
Even at my job at Texaco, I was once somebody. For years I had been the project leader for ESP (the Estimated Sales and Purchases computer system), and had a pretty good reputation as a hotshot application developer. 
Later I created and managed 14erWorld, a popular mountaineering website with thousands of members over nearly 10 years online. 
But nowadays I've become Norman Bates taking care of my elderly mother, while managing the Hoffmeyer House. I've become a prisoner in my house. I've become a nobody. I'm just that old guy across the street that rides his bike a lot. 
I guess when you get older you start to look at yourself in a different way. 
I ride my bike for sanity and little things like having a glass of wine or two after dinner with Val have become great pleasures to look forward to. 
I'm not complaining, nor looking for pity. I love my life and for the most part I've "got it made". I have my health, I'm comfortably retired, I'm able to play chess, take naps, play with my many pets, and cycle every day. 
Maybe I just miss the spotlight. 

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