Tuesday, January 2, 2018

2018/01/02 - The Beach Ball Story

I was 18 years old. 

Have you seen the movie Saturday Night Fevor? I’m actually a little embarrassed to admit that my friends and I were a lot like the guys in that movie. We would go out to clubs on Friday & Saturday nights, with the sole purpose of picking up chicks. 

We weren’t rich kids, so we would party on the way to the clubs, to save money for inside. 

On this particular night I needed to piss real bad, so I asked the driver to drop me off at the front door of the club, while they parked the car. I told them I’d wait for them in the lobby.

After relieving myself, I went to the lobby and sat down in a comfortable couch to wait for my buddies. 

I was totally wasted, high as a kite. All of a sudden I noticed a huge striped beach ball rocking back-and-forth on the arm chair of my couch. I smiled as I watched it and wondered how they did this. But the all of a sudden it stopped rocking!

So I started pushing on it with both hands, trying to get it rocking again, when it stood up turned around and screamed “What the fuck!”. I suddenly realized that it wasn’t a striped beach ball, it was the ass of a fat woman wearing striped pants. 

I was totally embarrassed and speechless, especially when her large boyfriend confronted me. 

What could I possibly say? How could I explain that I thought his girlfriend’s ass was a giant beach ball?

Luckily my four friends appeared in the lobby to rescue me from getting my ass kicked by her boyfriend. 

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